The Trojan War
A prince steals another king's wife, so Greece spends ten years besieging Troy over it. Ends with a giant wooden horse and a massacre.
0 The Trojan Horse
Greeks pretend to give up, leave a giant wooden horse outside the gates, and the Trojans wheel it inside themselves. The original phishing attack.
0 Achilles and Hector
Greece's greatest warrior vs Troy's greatest prince. One has plot armor everywhere except his heel. You can guess how this ends.
0 Odysseus Goes Home
After ten years of war he tries to sail home. It takes another ten years, involves a Cyclops, a witch, and the dead. The original hero's journey.
0 Sparta Builds Its War Machine
A whole society where boys are taken from their mothers at 7 to be turned into killing machines. Spoiler: it works extremely well.
0 Draco Writes the Laws
An Athenian writes laws so harsh that almost every crime is punishable by death. We still call brutal rules 'draconian' because of him.
0 The Battle of Marathon
Outnumbered Athenians charge a much bigger Persian army and somehow win. A guy runs 26 miles to deliver the news, then drops dead.
0 The 300 at Thermopylae
King Leonidas and 300 Spartans hold a mountain pass against an entire Persian empire. They lose the battle but win the legend.
0 The Battle of Salamis
Greek triremes lure the Persian fleet into a narrow strait and obliterate them. Xerxes watches from a throne on a hill, horrified.
0 Pericles' Golden Age
Athens enters its glow-up era: democracy, the Parthenon, theatre, philosophy. Then a plague kills a third of the city, including Pericles.
0 The Peloponnesian War
27 years of Athens vs Sparta. Plagues, betrayals, exile, and one of the most disastrous military expeditions in history. Athens loses everything.
0 Socrates Drinks the Hemlock
An old man asks too many questions in public. Athens votes to make him drink poison. He calmly does it while his students cry.
0 Plato Founds the Academy
The world's first university opens in an olive grove outside Athens. Lasts 900 years, invents most of Western philosophy.
0 Alexander the Great
By age 32 he's conquered most of the known world and reportedly cried because there was nothing left to conquer.
0 Alexander Cuts the Gordian Knot
Legend says whoever unties an impossible knot will rule Asia. Alexander pulls out his sword and cuts it in half. Cheating? Or genius?
0 The Death of Alexander
He drops dead at 32 in Babylon. His generals immediately rip the empire to shreds fighting over the corpse.
0 Archimedes Yells Eureka
A Greek genius figures out displacement in the bath, runs naked through the streets shouting about it. Later dies because he's too busy doing math to notice the Romans invading.
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